Tuesday, February 26

at a distance from God

At a distance from God there is darkness and death
There is illness.

The thought of that space is repugnant
Everything about it is wrong.

Not for a second would I want to be there.
Not for a moment could I stand it
Not at all could I bear it.
Breathing would be easier at the bottom of the sea.

So then how could I have lived there for so long?

Why do I speak about God all the time?
Why do I write, again and again, about this same love?
Why do I sing you the same song?
Does it become not a bore?

I do so because one is Holy, one is Lord.
Because every good thing comes from on high
Because besides God nothing is good.

I write about it because it is all I have.
In truth I am ill and it is my only hope.
I am dying, and of healing it is my only source.

I am underwater in a sinking ship, and there is only one little spot, one little space where the water is not.
One little corner of air.
I swim to the surface, I tilt my head and keep my mouth in that spot.
Only there do I breath.
When I speak with God.
I keep my self there, in that little crack of air and I wait. I wait for heaven. I wait for more.
I wait. 

Monday, February 25

good morning

I wanted to write to You, because speaking with you brings me peace.
I wanted to look at You, because Your sight is my joy.
I need Your rest.

I need Your rest so that I can go on.
I need Your peace so that I can do Your hard work.

Your burden is light because You carry it for me.
Your joy is enough because it is full.

I turn to You because I want to hear Your voice.
I look up and around for the light in Your eyes is the light of Love.
You are my home.
Come back.

Dear God. Thank You for being everywhere present and filling all things.
There is nothing else here
There is no one else here
There is nothing for me but what you give.

Without you there is a void.
It is in looking for You that I find.
It is in Your light that I see
And outside there it is only dark.

I long for You, and I am glad that You are here.

You hold on to me and I know not how to hold on to you. 
And I am glad that you do not let me go.

There are not words that matter
But words I use
Because with them I stall.
With them I traverse time
With them You stop a little,
And I can take a look.

Love, you are the light of the world.
You give me life.

good morning to you

This is a wish and a prayer, a good morning and a hello.
I miss You and I thank You for being.

In moments of silence You are there,
In corners of streets flowers grow.
Through windows and cracks sunlight comes in, and rests eternally peacefully, on creation and place.
You are my joy. You are in my life always.
My life is with You
And for You.
You are the only moment when life is.

In between
And everywhere
You smile at me.

There is your peace, and your rest, in the weight of the sun; in the way it sits on the pavement; on the chair; on my mind.

In the silence You are there. You are the joy of the world and I travel with You in your pocket.
Come back. 

Come back and quiet this noise. Make peaceful this place. End this make-belief. Make the darkness a soft shade. Warm the cold metals. Take me with you. Come back.